Monday, May 9, 2011

Just Say No to Facebook

My roommate freshman year created a Facebook profile for me without clearing it with me.  Not knowing how Facebook worked, I named 4 hot girls from high school and said if they accept my friendship I will keep the profile, otherwise delete it.  Within 24 hours I had four new "friends" because few people deny friend requests on Facebook.  So I gave it a try for a few months and I didn't care for it.

Why do you not have facebook?  People also ask me this question as soon as they find out I don't have Facebook.  I assume it's because they think I'm hiding something, possibly a girlfriend and I am just trying to get some on the side.  Mostly they just think its weird.  How could someone not have Facebook?  Everybody is doing it.  Well you see I'm stubborn.  I didn't get/like Facebook when I found out about it Freshman Year in college and I had a girlfriend at the time so what was the point.  If you are in a relationship what is the point of Facebook?

Acceptable Uses for Facebook:
This concludes the acceptable uses for Facebook.

Facebook is a cess pool.  Too many people feel a need to tell you all the cool things they are doing.  "Hitting up South St with the girls" "Getting my hair done for my date tonight"  Often times it reads as reasons I am better than you.  Look at all the cool stuff I'm doing.  Your life is not more interesting than the average person so stop.

Profile Pictures.  People judge you right or wrongly on your pictures and your profile.
Fat girls take pictures from the face up.  Ugly girls take pictures with a kissy face in every picture.  Vain dudes post tons of pictures with their shirts off trying to show off.  Cool kids take pictures with a red cup, because they party and want you to know about it.  Boyfriends and Girlfriends take soul crushing photos together because in a relationship with _____ isn't enough information.

I don't have Facebook because for me the negatives outweigh the positives.  I enjoy some level of privacy, and frankly there are alot of people I'd rather not talk to.  When Facebook expanded outside of colleges, how many people had their parents, relatives, employees submitting a friend request.  I would rather not allow some people access to what I do on the weekends or who I talk to.

Facebook is more impersonal than texting.  If its a girl I would rather talk to you in person or on the phone than exchange Facebook messages.  If its my friends I would rather get invited to an event not through a mass messages sent through Facebook.  How many of those people do you really want to show up to your 22nd bday?  Of course occasionally I miss out on some things for not being connected to Facebook but so be it.  One or two fun events or random hook ups missed are worth it to not deal with all the crap that comes with Facebook.  If someone is asking me to do something outside of Facebook, they actually want me to come.

Facebook is time consuming.  How much time do you waste on there?  It's crazy to think about.  You could actually be doing something productive like playing a sport or going to the bar to actually meet these Facebook friends.

I know I will regret writing this post because I do occasionally stalk people on Facebook and I do have a Twitter feed that I use to follow breaking recruiting news, but I will continue my silent protest against the masses on Facebook.


  1. Very interesting Devil's Advocate stance. Fully deserving of the seldom-used "Yeah I know most of you won't agree with this" tag.

  2. they took our jeeebs