April 19th- April 23rd
University of South Florida
Alpha Kalpa Appa Sorority House
It's rush week! Do you have what it takes to be the sorority? Only Ben knows. Can you handle your alcohol or more importantly your ryhpnol? Only the district attorney knows. Ben will be helping pledges get acclimated to sorority life. He calls it "breaking them in." Challenges include "7 minutes in heaven" and "square peg in round hole."
May 1st-May 3rd
As the saying goes 14 is 18 in Canada. The legal age of consent that is. Windsor is a short trip from Detriot,MI. It features two colleges, the University of Windsor and St.Clair College. The legal age to drink and gamble is 19. Casinos dominate the area by the Detriot River. Many Detroit residents will make the short trip to gain two years in age. Several unsuspecting young and impressionable people are expected to be in the area. Ben will enjoy cuban cigars, absinthe, and we can assume several females.
Ben will be using the line "Uncle with benefits" all weekend long. He will serve as a judge in a local beauty padgent and promise many girls first prize (little do they know child support is more valuable). He will also meet his niece for the first time and be using his go to line. Ben will help with some yard work with many farmer's daughters as well. Video survallience technology is not believed to be in existance in WV as of yet.
To be continued if embraced by the readers
For the record I think Ben is innocent, but what the hell do I know. This is a parody.