Wednesday, December 29, 2010

Sites of Future Bowl Games: Yemen


When: December 30 or 31th, it depends on atmospheric conditions (i.e. artillery flying through the air, grenades)

Who: A stodgy Big Ten team (three yards in a cloud of dust has a whole new meaning)  vs. Kentucky or another team sure to be 6-6.

What: We're Safer than Somalia Bowl.  Sponsored by Gatorade (because you have no H2O)

Where: San'a', Yemen.  Specifically the Ali Muhesen Stadium (Capacity 25,000).  San'a' is the largest city in Yemen but yet the first to run out of water.  When checking through airport security make sure you bring plenty of your own water.  O yeah you can't do that, but it's Yemen so there are not real strict on WMDs so there's that.

If You Go: 
  • Pretend your are Muslim, and act like you hate all world powers.  Cozy up with some warlords and enjoy some of the finest dining and house you can find.
  • There is no rail system so use mini buses to transport your way around the city.  They usually hold about 10 people.
  • The average temperature is 68 degrees in December so you should be comfortable, weather wise at least
  • The beach is just about everywhere so ladies will enjoy the trip.  Where else can women get a tan, and men shop for guns in the same place?
  • Bowl activities include praying five times a day, occasionally running for your life, sleeping with one eye open, and cowering in a corner while civilians are terrorized
  • You are a real fan of exhibition football if you are brave enough to attend this game, and will be rewarded with 500 virgins if you do not return.

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